Currents of Time

So I just put up a hugelong rantramble that directly involves my mother and something she said to me in a place where she’ll see it (I probably won't be cross-posting it, so it's here on Facebook, mostly about asexuality, if you're curious. ...yes, my mother joined FB). Kind of hoping this doesn’t turn into drama! I don't mean for it to, I just don't see the point of hiding it from her. Been in a bit of an inexplicable rage all day, though, so maybe I do mean for it to cause drama? I can't tell. Anyway. Yeah. This was going to be the Dissidia post, by the way, but I got distracted and sidetracked myself halfway through and so I have cut it down to just this, instead. The other stuff's all saved in a word doc, anyway.

Fic. Apparently I'm actually considering plot. Not any more confident about it, but I feel obligated now that other people have prodded me towards the fact checking I needed. (Turns out what I'd thought was right, but I managed to misspell my own name twice today and then lost track of when it was to a point of years, which probably says enough about my mental state and why I really do not trust my brain at all these days.) I have t-- two? Three? Days off after tomorrow, so assuming I don't get called in (and that the oven does not explode - hey, we have a new heat sensor that we attach inside the door and that rests on the door handle, so you drop it on the floor every time you open or close the oven, and the sensor pad on the wire that goes inside the oven is missing, so really it's not effective, either), I should be feeling marginally more functional (coherent is probably too much to hope for) by the weekend.

I am making a poll. It does not, for the curious, have anything to do with the fact-checking I needed to do (those were, you know, facts, and what I'm asking about is more opinion, unless I am forgetting things, which is entirely likely), but I was poking around the fanbase - oh, I'm talking about FFVIII again, here - earlier this afternoon and, you know, stuff, train of thought jumping all over the place, I don't remember where I was looking that this jumped back into my brain, but I'm just wondering what other people think about it! Because I've seen a lot of different thoughts on it (and given it a fair amount of contemplation myself. It's one of the things I always wish they'd addressed more in canon, even though I know there was not really anywhere to work it in), though I think I narrowed it down to the ones I've seen the most? And actually since this will probably end up playing at least some role in the fic I am at least going to attempt to write (no guarantees) (it would be set post-game), if most everyone has different ideas than mine (or if there's stuff in canon), I might work with some of that instead?

(Also, late edit: it is probably better to consider the third question as relating to events post-game.)

( Poll. Contains spoilers for FF8! )

RANDOM COMMENT: it actually makes me really (and irrationally) angry when people say that Final Fantasy XI “doesn’t count” for [insert reasoning here]. Because it’s stupid. Because you have to pay for monthly access. Because it’s online. You’re allowed to not like it! You’re allowed to not want to play it, or to think the MMORPG format isn’t a good one, but it counts. It has a story. It has characters (beyond you and the other players you meet) that you care about. Sure, you’re along for the ride a little more directly than usual, but you’re still not the hero. That role still goes to the NPCs. IT’S CALLED FINAL FANTASY XI. It is a number in the sequence! And I just get kind of upset when people dismiss it (as they often do). Really. You can say “I’ve played all the games in the series except XI” WITHOUT tacking on “because that one doesn’t count” at the end. If it doesn’t count, why do you feel obligated to mention it? No one is judging you. You don’t have to put it down like that. I promise.

Er, if anyone's been wondering what happened to me - almost two weeks without posting? Probably a record - I occasionally go through extreme bouts of inability to be at all social. During these times, dealing and interacting with others becomes too hard for me, and I tend to fall off the face of society in every way possible, and I emotionally disconnect from most everyone around me. I do not know why this happens. I deal with it when it happens, even though that's hard. It's actually more comfortable staying like it, and it takes effort to pull myself back out of it. (I wonder if the ridiculous amount of posting I did in February was a subconscious attempt to head this off - forcing myself to socialize is the only way around it.) Someone called me on hiding this afternoon, and I'm feeling a little bit more normal, anyway, so, er, Hi. I'm here and posting again.

Mostly I have spent the last while attending my classes, doing my homework (and finding out my 2003 copy of Excel can't make the graphs required for class, that was fun), going to work, and then, in my free time, conducting some cooking experiments but, for the most part, sitting at home watching Top Gear (they've lots of episodes I've not seen here) and playing FFXI with my brother (because he's not included in the massive pool of people I ignore while in one of my phases). We camped a few notorious monsters, were murdered in a few besieged events, collected and traded in entirely too many eggs for the Easter event Egg Hunt (as a result of this, my Mog House is now in a state of CONSTANT NOISE. If by "constant" one means "every fifteen minutes." Turns out the new furnishings have sound effects), and we took Nabiki and Hisi through a few more of the Wings of the Goddess missions. Summary of events: omgwtf male mithra

Also, I saw another lawn covered in plastic flamingos ... yesterday? Madness. And my BotCon invoice came in. I'm in the blue group! Which means, if I want to get to MSTF (which I most definitely do), I will probably have to skip picking up the at-con exclusives until later on in the weekend.


A very short conversation with my mother (because my parents aren't entirely exempt from the group of people I start ignoring) a night or two ago - wherein I revealed I'd written a few more parts for "GT" (my mother read and actually liked "GT". Yeah, it surprised me, too) - saw her voicing the same conclusion that I'd reached earlier. I probably ought to drop the Offshoots. My inner thirteen year old protests this vehemently, as she appears to enjoy writing the things. Could I get a few opinions on this? It's still weird to me to think I've written things featuring real people, and we all know I can't be trusted to give myself sound writing advice. Other people seem to like them, and if I look at ... everything I've written and finished in the last year (I started writing/plotting out "GT" in March of last year. That is odd to think about) has been at the request, or at least encouragement, of other people.

Not real good at writing for myself, but then I'm content with playing things out in my head, so that's not much of a surprise is it?


... I'm not feeling verbose enough to bother typing this out more than I have and I don't want to exceed my current self-imposed word-limit for the month. I write for people because I don't feel the need to write for myself! SHOULD WE TRY A POLL?

[Poll #1156599]


My answers are lame because I am only filling this out so it stops prompting me to. Shut up, little boxes.

And if anyone has anything they want to see, I will take pretty much any request. Ask ineptmagicuser (and I should probably forbid her to answer this post but I am not, because I apparently don't value my sanity in the least). She's got me writing something that might be romance if you squint at it hard enough. Seriously. What is that, Aniko.


Edit:
Er, comment insanity happened. You can ignore it. Or join in. Whichever.