Um.

[jecca_mehlota]

I am fairly certain I've made this entry before (possibly multiple times), but apparently I think it needs repeating (again). Blame my fluctuating mental state. Or the allergy meds. Both, even! The point, anyway, is that I am really kind of terribly awful at leaving comments (you are all shocked by this revelation, I am sure). It is not because I do not read your entries, or that I do not care (actually, I will confess that I do not read Glee-related entries, which many of you do write, because I simply do not care about that show. At all. But that is nothing personal, that is me really not like a series, and different tastes and all), it is just that I never know what to say. It seems like someone has always already said it better than me, or that what I would say would just be trite or annoying. And I know that is kind of crap, because I, at least, totally don't notice if someone has said something totally ridiculous in a comment left here. I always love getting comments! But (and this is partly what the meds and most recent run of therapy's about) I have recurring troubles with self-esteem and all, so despite knowing a comment I'd leave wouldn't bother me if someone else left it, I can't help but imagine it will annoy the pants off of whoever I leave it for. (I am even having trouble doing things as simple as hitting "Like" on Facebook these days.)


This was just something I was reflecting on as I did that whole 30 Days of Video Games meme, during which I got an unusually high number of comments, but I was leaving even less than usual. And I feel really bad about this, but at the moment, I am just not equipped to deal with it. So, I'm sorry, and I hope no one feels like I am ignoring them or that I don't like them or don't care. I'm just not in a very good brain-space.

Comments

[twilit-wanderer.livejournal.com]

Thanks. Unfortunately, the irrational, malfunctioning part of my brain gets the better of me sometimes, and I start fretting. I do not want people thinking I do not read or care about them or anything they say, but can't do anything to calm myself down from it, so you get entries like this one. (I have fairly ridiculous standards that I hold myself - never others, it is just myself - to sometimes.)

... I totally didn't finish that thought, ugh. Anyway, thank you. Rationally, I know these things, but sometimes hearing it from other people helps cement it. So. Thanks.