Bruises on my knees again.

[jecca_mehlota]

As promised to the spiders, today my mother brought out her proper vacuum and we all but literally turned a few rooms (three, because kitchen didn't really need it and Aniko's room is Aniko's business) upside down cleaning them out. I've no doubt there are still spiders about - we got back from dinner and, damn it, there was a huge one near the ceiling in the bathroom. The vacuum had gone home (though it left its little vacuum child for cleaning in the corners), so I just threw the beast outside. This paragraph has nothing to do with the rest of the entry.



To be frank, right now I'm not sure why I bother. I'm debating giving up, or at least taking a break. Not sure anyone'd notice or care.

Saw a quote today that wasn't anything I didn't already know. It wasn't deep, or profound, or meaningful, but the raw truth of it really struck me.

I don't think I'm going to post it, though, because I... don't know, I'm being really intentionally vague here, and I'm afraid that alone might freak people out, and I'm sorry if it does? I just worry if I do post it, it might start seeming like some weird passive-aggressive stunt. I swear it's not, I've just been thinking all day and, I don't know, things are just feeling really ... futile.

I've been picking at old wounds again, and I really need to stop it before I reopen or damage something.

Comments

[rionaleonhart]

Whatever's happening, I wish I could give you a hug, and I hope things become better for you soon.

[twilit-wanderer.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I hope so, too.

[aerinity.livejournal.com]

I know we don't chat a ton, but I am always here for you.

[twilit-wanderer.livejournal.com]

Thanks, I really do appreciate that. Unfortunately, this is one of those things that I probably will never feel comfortable bringing up directly. (Not that I'm a very good conversation starter, anyway. XD;)