Jecca Mehlota (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
jecca_mehlota) wrote2008-05-14 12:30 am
jecca_mehlota) wrote2008-05-14 12:30 am
Ecco vs Sam Tyler, FIGHT.
THIS IS ME NOT TALKING ABOUT THE USA Life on Mars PROMOTIONAL VIDEO/TRAILER/THING THAT IS OUT NOW.
Here.
Have some more Ecco haiku that I will probably upload to FF.net if my account ever starts working properly again. (Maybe it's working now. I think I stopped checking about a month ago.) And, you know. If I finish them. HOW DO YOU HAVE UNFINISHED HAIKU?
... What, I'm supposed to have an answer for that?
Disclaimer says: Not my dolphin!
Jecca says: "Welcome to the Machine" (AKA: DOLPHIN MEAT GRINDER) is the worst thing ever. (I have beaten this level exactly once. I have skipped it with passwords every other time. It is hideous and awful.)
Unending Forced-Scrolling Tunnels of DEATH
Drone! Begin again.
Stuck in a corner! Restart.
Where is the exit?!
Queen, round 1
You think you've escaped?
Don't let the Queen kill yo-- oops!
Back to The Machine.
Round 2?
I've removed your eyes!
Now let's see you eat dolphins
with your jaw knocked off.
Seriously, if you die on the last level? You go back to The Machine. It's unfair. Like, break down into hysterics unfair. It is really good motivation to not die.
Of course, after you FINALLY BEAT THAT STUPID LEVEL I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT the Queen is like.... nothing. Seriously, she is ridiculously easy to beat. That holds true in the second game (and the third!), as well, actually.
ffffff* my brother suggested I try to do speed runs of Ecco levels (he's been timing himself for the final level of Sonic 2. He can beat Metal Sonic - 8 hits - and Robotnik's Death Eggwalker Thing - 12 hits - both of which can kill you quite easily as there are no rings in the final level - in 49 seconds) and dolphins got in my blood and I cannot get them back out.
* When did I get into the habit of hissing air out through my teeth in an "fffssss" sound when frustrated? Seriously, what is this?
WHOEVER INVENTED "THE MACHINE" NEEDS TO BE SENT THERE. DON'T EVEN TALK TO ME ABOUT "City of Forever." Unless you want to watch me, I don't know, explode or something.
...I DON'T FEEL BETTER NOW.
Edit:
To entertain myself, I just went browsing on GameFAQs for Ecco walkthroughs. This one is hilarious and contains the truest line ever:
Ecco's Likelyhood of Survival (against Trilobites)- So bad, if I represented this on a numeric scale, the number is so low it hasn't been invented yet.
Here.
Have some more Ecco haiku that I will probably upload to FF.net if my account ever starts working properly again. (Maybe it's working now. I think I stopped checking about a month ago.) And, you know. If I finish them. HOW DO YOU HAVE UNFINISHED HAIKU?
... What, I'm supposed to have an answer for that?
Disclaimer says: Not my dolphin!
Jecca says: "Welcome to the Machine" (AKA: DOLPHIN MEAT GRINDER) is the worst thing ever. (I have beaten this level exactly once. I have skipped it with passwords every other time. It is hideous and awful.)
Unending Forced-Scrolling Tunnels of DEATH
Drone! Begin again.
Stuck in a corner! Restart.
Where is the exit?!
Queen, round 1
You think you've escaped?
Don't let the Queen kill yo-- oops!
Back to The Machine.
Round 2?
I've removed your eyes!
Now let's see you eat dolphins
with your jaw knocked off.
Seriously, if you die on the last level? You go back to The Machine. It's unfair. Like, break down into hysterics unfair. It is really good motivation to not die.
Of course, after you FINALLY BEAT THAT STUPID LEVEL I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT the Queen is like.... nothing. Seriously, she is ridiculously easy to beat. That holds true in the second game (and the third!), as well, actually.
ffffff* my brother suggested I try to do speed runs of Ecco levels (he's been timing himself for the final level of Sonic 2. He can beat Metal Sonic - 8 hits - and Robotnik's Death Eggwalker Thing - 12 hits - both of which can kill you quite easily as there are no rings in the final level - in 49 seconds) and dolphins got in my blood and I cannot get them back out.
* When did I get into the habit of hissing air out through my teeth in an "fffssss" sound when frustrated? Seriously, what is this?
WHOEVER INVENTED "THE MACHINE" NEEDS TO BE SENT THERE. DON'T EVEN TALK TO ME ABOUT "City of Forever." Unless you want to watch me, I don't know, explode or something.
...I DON'T FEEL BETTER NOW.
Edit:
To entertain myself, I just went browsing on GameFAQs for Ecco walkthroughs. This one is hilarious and contains the truest line ever:
Ecco's Likelyhood of Survival (against Trilobites)- So bad, if I represented this on a numeric scale, the number is so low it hasn't been invented yet.