jecca_mehlota: (Grow wings and fly high)
Jecca Mehlota ([personal profile] jecca_mehlota) wrote2017-03-27 09:34 pm

PROGRESS MADE: NONE. MILES TRAVELLED: SO MANY

I HAVE A LOT OF STUFF TO SAY AND NONE OF IT IS WORTHWHILE


This bad guy is a dwarf. I don't remember what his name is and I don't care. He is a dwarf. Anyway, bummer, they know we're alive now.


BACK TO THE CAR

oooo, chocobo forest?? Gimme!

"Best fill up the tank," Ignis says, as if it is not COMPLETELY FULL ALREADY, man, we filled it before we left, remember? Cidney even washed the windows for us.

Oh. I can drive now. Yay, I guess?

I CAN'T THINK OF A SINGLE REASON WHY I WOULD NOT GO TO THE CHOCOBO POST.

Oh, no, Ignis' coffee is out of stock. NO ONE TELL HIM, hahaha.


wait, I can play fake pinball in this game? oh nooooooooooo

How many stages are there in this?


I ESCAPED


Got an accessory, though, that's pretty cool.


So I went out to do some quests and I'm like, haha, that rock in the lake kinda looks like it's an animal.

Spoilers: IT'S ALIVE

OH GOD IT'S HUGE

AND IT HAS A WEIRD NECK


I can't get to them. :(



haaaarrrr... So here I've been thinking, for all the memes and ridiculous stuff I've seen about Ignis and his "new recipes," I haven't actually heard it said?

Three times in five minutes. Whoops.



Heh, we're making camp and five feet away an Iron Giant is grumbling and snorting and making all those weird, awful noises. Good thing they're afraid of glowy circles in rocks.



I'VE BEEN INVITED TO A PICTURE TAKING ADVENTURE

HELL TO THE YES



Ug, the lip synching is so baaaad I can't watch it.

Are these things we wants to photograph the massive water-beasts I was trying to get to yesterday?

Anyway, mushrooms acquired.


PROMPTO, I HAVE NEVER SEEN YOU MOVE THAT FAST. How the hell are you already there?

You want me the lure the water beast.

Noct, you are a good friend to this lunatic.


He's been saying catoblepas.

WELP. I and everyone I know has been mispronouncing that.


I'll be damned. That is indeed a catoblepas.


I should've let it get closer, though I guess that is pretty close. Don't want to get eaten.

ALRIGHT NOW LAUGH LIKE A LOON AND RUN FOR YOUR LIFE that's closer than I thought oh shit hahaha


Ah, they will come onland

PROOPREJTGF FFS NO

OW

well, thank god it knocked us out of the combat field with that snort, THANKS FOR RUNNING UP TO IT AND HITTING IT, PROMPTO YOU ALMOST KILLED US BOTH as if it weren't my fault for waiting to see if it'd leave the lake.

IT WAS TOO FAR AWAY ARE YOU KIDDING FIGHT ME


goooddddd it doesn't matter WHAT I do, fucking Dalamud follows me. METEOR CRATER. I mean, you could say FFVII, too, but it looks a lot more like the mess in Coerthas, minus the snow.



NOCT FOR GOD'S SAKE SIT DOWN AND BUCKLE UP

SIT


STOP STANDING WHILE THE CAR IS IN MOTION


I'm trying to catch frogs and the water is deep enough to spill into Noct's boots and I just eeugh wet socks and also it'd be cool if I could just find these frogs, enough with the raining Imperials?

Like how do they keep finding us so fast, anyway.

Prompto, stop checking in on social media.


WE ARE GOING TO STARVE TO DEATH OUT HERE BEFORE I FIND THIS LAST FROG



FINALLY

Final frog got a cutscene, sure, whatever, let's just go, it's almost night.

Ignis, I love you, but we were about to go to town, we really didn't need to have that little meeting.


haha, man, these guys get so excited about shopping in these little marts.


Noct has met his new BFF, the fishing dude.

Fishing hole, raining....

LET'S FISH


I DON'T CARE IF Y'ALL ARE BORED, LEAVE THE POOR KID ALONE


ANYWAY WE GOTTA CATCH THE CRAG BARRAMUNDI




BOOM, FISH.



awwww yeaaaah, crag barramundiiiiiiiiiii

New lure!


Oh, sure, NOW you want me to fish.

Well.

I mean...

If you insist....


Okay, that was a good use of a day.

Tomorrow chocobos, promise.


Also, hey, I should spend all this AP, haha, that's right. I didn't feel like dealing with it the first I opened this thing.



Anyway, OFF TO CHOCOBO LAND.

Is wonder-coffee really that amazing?

OF COURSE IT IS, as if Ignis would dare to proclaim its greatness otherwise.

I turn to talk to the arms seller for TWO SECOND and Prompto as fallen in with a band of NPCs. I see how it is.....


This world really reminds me a lot of Eorzea.

I THOUGHT HE CALLED IT THE METEOR OF COERTHAS FOR A SECOND AND I WAS LIKE WAIT NO JUST BECAUSE IT REMINDS ME DOESN'T MEAN THE NAMES SHOULD BE THE SAME WHAT WHAT it's cool, it's not actually Coerthas, but yeah, let's go see it.

After chocobos.

I don't want Prompto to actually desert me, and he might at this rate.



WHAT DO YOU MEAN I CAN'T RENT A CHOCOBO

Let's go kill that jerkwad behemoth.


ANOTHER NEW RECIPEH


Look, I'm all for trying foods out, but I'm kinda with Noct, here. We've had at least fourteen other games telling us gysahl greens don't taste good to people. Just because now you can buy them to eat, yourself......

Can't wait for Imperials to drop on me while I'm trying to find/kill this thing.


we wander into the den of the behemoth

"-- the hell?"

"Something's amiss."

Yes, boys, that would be the behemoth whose den we just wandered into.


Actually dying a little at Noct claiming his new strength is from his balanced diet.


The hell did this mist come from, is this supposed to be atmospheric, or just a coincidence?


Aw, cute, other people will go through the narrow spaces first if they think there might actually be danger.


I realise whispering would probably not matter since behemoths are, you know, fucking huge and all, but it still seems like talking normally is wrong?? Gladio, he's gonna HEAR you.

Anyway, as long as he can't cast ecliptic meteor, we should be fine.


QUICK STAB HIS TONGUE WHILE HE'S ROARING


ugh, losers.


Mist is definitely supposed to be atmospheric. Can't seeee.


Paused to type that, I'm the only one in the party. H-hey? Guys?!


haha, ha, it's, um. Getting late. Sure hope Iron Giants don't spawn near this guy. haaa.....


If this were Ecco, there'd be a jump scare in here somewhere.


HOW ARE YOU JERKS ALL HERE ALREADY, WHAT THE HELL, WAS THERE A SHORTCUT Y'ALL JUST DIDN'T TELL ME ABOUT?!

WHERE. DID. YOU. COME FROM.


Guys, please get out of the fire....


Can't believe they're comparing themselves to a gatcha-style mobile game. These nerrrrds, ugh, I love them.


Man, it's totally nighttime.

Okay, so that's not marked as a campsite on my map, but it's got all three of those element-rocks (wtf were they called, they're Draw Points now), so I'm pretty sure it is one, and it's close, so. Let's just hope I am not betrayed.

awww, yeaaaah, it totally is.

Let's try one of Ignis's TOTALLY ORIGINAL recipes.


CHOCOBIRDS UNLOCKED WOOHOO!!


Chicobos look so much like fluffy chickens aaaaaa



I can't believe Prompto will sing the victory theme.



... huh. That's totally carbuncle in this photo. I... don't remember seeing him there.


Man, was this "photograph the wild chocobo" quest available yesterday? Because it's the same location as the behemoth lair. Totally could've done this at the same time. It probably wasn't, though. On account of, you know, behemoth.


Guys, you know I love you, but you're even worse at steering your chocobos than I am, and that's.... really a problem.



oh no, it's the frog lady. Frogs are hard to fiiiind, nooooo...


okay noted, Iron Giants can and will spawn in the middle of the road




YOU FEED YOUR CHOCOBOS DINNER OMGGGGGGGggggg


prompto is still really bad at selfies lol



why is ignis asking me to help him make breakfast

what am i going to have to kill for him


Noct, you can't just threaten to rip his throat out.


Rip Ignis. "Tomorrow? :D :D?" lolno :( :(


COEURLS IN THIS GAME ARE PSYCOTIC, RAGING HELLBEASTS, OKAY, WHAT THE FUCK.


WHERE IS THIS BLOODY DOG TAG I WANT TO GO TO BED


Prompto, please explain to me how your feet hurt when almost all we've done today is ride chocobos around.


My chocobo, being level five, is now a higher level than everyone but Prompto, who is level six. The rest of us are just terrible.


hahaha there are four shots of Noct's butt as he gets on his chocobo in today's pictures. Four. Wow.


Noct saying "icky" about the centipedes we just killed is my new favourite thing.

Hey, rainbow trout!


yeah, I know I came here to catch frogs, but....

TFW YOU CAN SEE THE DAMN FISH FOLLOWING YOUR LURE BUT THEY WON'T BITE

anyway that's enough trout for a bit, at least.



I AM SO BAD AT FROGS OH MY GOD I can hear them but it's like I go selectively colourblind or something aslkgtsdjak


FINALLYYYY


YOU GUYS COULD HAVE HELPED, YOU KNOW.



Minding own business slaying centilegbeasts --- LASERS.


Wait, that was - it's Iron Giant time already?!

Oh good, and he brought giant spider friends with him....



we interrupt this ffxv stream-of-consciousness entry to inform you that my cat is too adorable and i'm gonna die


HA, SEE, THE CHOCOBO KNOWS I CAN OUTRUN THE IMPERIALS. IT DOESN'T MAKE US ALL STOP AND GET OFF. IGNIS. I'M LOOKING AT YOU.



Anyway, it's been a few days in real life and a few more days than that in the game. I should ... probably get back to the car at some point.


Oh no, now Wiz wants vegetables. You and Noct had a good thing, Wiz, but... you just can't be friends anymore.


JUST ALMOST GOT KILLED TRYING TO FEED CHOCOBO

IS GOOD DAY



Time for loooong car ride. PILGRIMAGE QUEST, I know, Ignis, I'm sorry, you asked to do this like three weeks ago.


Prompto, stop asking me who you should take pictures of. Haven't you figured out yet that Noct is Lord of Ambivalence yet?


I like how even when there's no dialogue playing, they all still act and move around and stuff. Also Ignis drinks a lot.


someone just moo'd.


Oh, I somehow did not foresee this involving fighting Imperials. That was... really incredibly shortsighted of me.

Ha! So, I'm... not actually sure what just happened, Noct went flying across the area somehow, and there were suddenly SO MANY LASERS HOOOOLY COW.

Anyway, I thought this quest was level 16, this thing is higher level than that. Did it increase to match me, or....? It's dead, but we can't go any farther. :( Man, I'm bummed, I wanted to go see.


O shit Gladio just called me out on avoiding Lestallum, hahaha. I guess we should head that way.


Ignis, no.

SO RIGHT WE STOP AT THE BLOCKADE AND FIGHT A THING, AND THEN WE GET BACK IN THE CAR, he proceeds to continue driving forward "It's a dead end" YOU THINK?


Oh, no, it's getting dark, we need to stop soon WE ARE FIVE FEET FROM LESTALLUM IGNIS, I BELIEVE IN YOU.

Phew, made it.


They ragging on my choice of sleeping locations. Rude.

CUP NOODLES DETECTED


FFXIV SOUNDTRACK LOCATED there are two discs? Weird.

I am not entirely sure why I keep buying these, I've just been letting the radio play whatever in the car.


NOCT YOU CAN'T JUST TAKE THINGS OFF MERCHANT BOOTHS

"Kenny and Kelly Crow" are you kidding me. Who makes these Hunt posters.

FM&A produces a lot of stuff. That or Noct just likes the label, since I can check so many of their jars.


I want to eat all these foods, ugh. Game. Why you bully me.


GUYS, it's 2am, why didn't you say something, ugh. Where's the hotel, for your delicate selves.

Ugh, it's expensive. Y'ALL BEST APPRECIATE.

I know basically all Final Fantasy games start out with you broke for forever but uuugh no gil.

I WANT TO SAVE ALL THESE PICTURES. PROMPTO, STOP TAKING PICTURES OF YOU ALL BEING GOOFS, IT'S MEAN.

Okay maybe not this picture of the back of your seat in the car, what was this, a misfire?

also this pic of ignis without his glasses on is weirding me out

is this how other people feel about me when i take mine off

i'm so sorry



Gawd, you are all still on about the room. Look, I'm SORRY, tents are cheap and we're usually out in the middle of nowhere come Iron Giant Time. I don't have to listen to you.

Where is Iris.

This place is much less sketchy in daylight.


... I lost Gladio to a poster for "Uncle Randell Root Beer." Really, Gladio? He really wants a root beer, hahaha.


....... she's at the hotel we just left? Mightn't you have mentioned this earlier?

Some guy just gave me free food, sweet.


wtf was that creepy vision. PSYCHIC EARTHQUAKE. Is this common?


I can't get over her name being pronounced "Eeris" instead of, you know, iris.

Noct doesn't have manners, either, he and the kid have something in common. Aw, Grandpa, you ruined it.


"IF THERE'S ANYTHING ELSE , YOU CAN ASK ME. WINK WINK WINK"

Noct: oblivious

That was hilarious and awkward, hahaha.

Oh, we got to sleep for free that time. Alas.

YOU CAN'T GRADE ME A D ON THAT SHIT I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANY OF IT I WAS IN TOWN WHAT RUDE


my cat is still adorable



are you flirting with me iris

you... know he has three boyfriends (one of whom is your brother??) and a fiancée, right?


"It's even more beautiful out here at night!" Don't lie to me. Did you hear that sigh? Noct knows that's a lie, too.

hahaha aaaa noctis is so awkward this is beautiful and terrible


wow. a power plant.

Ah, I guess that's cool I guess.


YOU WOULD LOVE THE DRINKS HERE! would i.
IMAGINE TAKING ONE OF THESE FOR A SPIN! mh
AHH THE BREEZE FEELS SO GOOD! hugghhghhh

noct

you're killing me


So that was. A thing, hahaha.


If you bought me something, I hope it's either edible or potions.



Ignis wants the packed pecks of pickled peppers.



Live
Eat
Breathe
METEOR

This is a good shirt, I would like one, even if the dude is kinda sketchy.


Ignis, your peppers are right here but I cannot buy them as they are not for sale. I am sorry.



Hey Word, thanks for crashing and eating at least one paragraph.


Soooo... yeah, what I said was basically, this is on page fourteen and we just spent the entire day on an awkward Not Date and then picking up a bunch of sidequests, so let's boogie back to the hotel, post an entry, and call it a wrap on both ends.



aaaaa they're playing cards aaaaa

also, not sure if relieved or disappointed prompto didn't creep pictures of that walkabout this morning, haha.




this game is killing me but in the good way so far at least
rionaleonhart: legend of korra: korra cocks an eyebrow, looking smug. (we shall see)

[personal profile] rionaleonhart 2017-03-28 08:03 am (UTC)(link)
I'm glad you're splitting chapter three up into multiple entries! It's easy to spend a very long time in chapter three, so when you cleared chapter two I was worried we wouldn't hear from you for weeks.

I was also OUTRAGED that Prompto said the catoblepas hadn't been close enough for the photo. (And then I reloaded and did the quest again. Just to make you happy, Prompto! Even though you're a TERRIBLE FRIEND.)

Finding frogs is terrible. I am sorry for your suffering. At least the second lot aren't in an imperial drop spot.

YOU FEED YOUR CHOCOBOS DINNER OMGGGGGGGggggg

I got so excited the first time I camped with chocobos and saw my guys leaning against them. This game is so cute.

YOU CAN'T GRADE ME A D ON THAT SHIT I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANY OF IT I WAS IN TOWN WHAT RUDE

This is my favourite line in the entry.